Love Phoenix,Suzaku!

Monday, March 09, 2009

The day before tomorrow

I'm getting anxious about tomorrow!!! In case some of you don't know... MY RESULT's coming out! ARGH!!! Please let it be a good one. Let me still have my study luck...

I always think i have some kind of luck in exams. Like ~~primary 6 and~~ form 3, i didn't really expect it. Yea, maybe it was just easy or something that year. There was so many people who got 8 and 9 As so 7As seems like nothing. Well, It was already a great achievement ;) Plus, in other batch it is a marvelous result already.

Form 5 was also unexpected. I keep failing add maths in class and occasionally some science. Still, I got all credits with 3As. Sure it may seem like a bad grade compared to others in class but in my sister's batch, 10 credits as in what i got was already a good grade. So why my batch so many brains one?

Oh please, let me have that kind of luck also for form 6. Pray hard hard~~~~

Labels: Skool

SS Phoenix @ 2:00 PM

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Saturday, July 12, 2008

Really Randoms

If my blog is a person and posts are what keeps him alive, my blog must be a bed-ridden sick old man. Might as well end life, cut loose and get on with life. Haha. Tried changing the skin but can't seem to do it right. Skins from blogskins doesn't seems to work. LOTS of editing needed. Being a Tech-no doesn't make it more easier. Darn it. :/ No, i'm not closing down my blog. Just lazy to update. I do read others blogs and i admire their passion to keep it updated like kennysia, xiaxue and my friends like liping and chung sun. no wonder my english seems to be getting quite poor compared to when i was in form 5.

I'm feeling pressured. Failed maths and chem on the last sem's finals. And by a really big margin too. I'm thinking of going tuition for maths. For chemistry and bio, i'll be working my arse on it. On a side note, i've still managed to pass that compulsory sub but not safe yet. Just pass is not going to cut it. Might go tuition for that as well. How come my friend like Jeff have that kind of serious attitude when it comes to studying and i don't? I thought you'll become more similar with the people you hang out with over time? Man.....

I just need to be in the right mood i think. Hmmm, it's really hard for me to have that mood lo. It only happens right before exams and tests. Even for O level, i studied last minute. Was lucky to pass all. Lots of specs dropped for that ;-) I've been a happy go lucky guy for most part of my life. But this time, it's different. I feel the vibe. That this is definitely one of those obstacles that determines my life. One of those time point which changes my entire life and how i'm going to live.

I failed even in average for the last sem. And when i told this to mom, She said " You have to start working hard lo, If you fail, then what is the purpose for you to sacrifice a comfortable life to return to malaysia to study?" Somewhat like that. And it struck me hard. She clearly sounded disappointed. I've always tried not to let her down and it's been going well with few occasional disappointments but not in my studies. She never have to worry about that starting form 1. I was always in her expectation(I've always have higher la) to at least pass but now? I've assure her last time that i'll pass and i did. This time, i assured her that i won't fail too much in maths and chem but i did. At least 30% margin for both.

Sorry, if i bored you with this. It seems that all i can blog about are studies. I don't have an interesting life. It's just been like going with the flow of fate. Smooth, calm and nothing interesting ever seems to happen. Well, it's not like my life is dull, it's colourful. But once in a while i would live to have something extreme. Something totally out of ordinary of my life. But phew, if i'm always that way, i would have died of depression. ;)

Something out of ordinary
I had a grey hair plucked out of my head by a friend! GREY HAIR! Me! My face doesn't suit to have grey hair! It's like a baby with armpit hair! It's just plain unacceptable! I must be worrying too much and sleeping irregularly. Have to live like a normal teenage such as able to not sleep in class even if the teacher's one of the most boring teacher i've ever met. Yes, i still continue that habit ;( It acts as a defense mechanism for boringness. Haha! Might as well make that my resolution for next year. Hmm, don't think i've made any resolutions before. It would be a new start.

I found out that i'm a flirt or at least feels like one based on the reactions of people around me. Whenever I'm close to any members of the opposite sex, I would be deemed falling for them. Either we're together or i'm hitting on them. Ok, luckily people who truly knows my 'lovey' attitudes (which is few) towards female counterparts is just a sign of a deep rooted pure friendship with them. Maybe even sisters liao. Don't mind the rumours though, it must mean the people are jealous and are denying the possibly of a true pure friendship between man and woman. I feel sorry for them to live in such a small tiny world ;)

To end this post. I hereby solute two of my friends for understanding themselves and I'm really happy for them. Now the fun begins *evil grin* Hahahahahahhaha!! You know who you are Mr ------- and Miss -----. Ironic event. lol!

Labels: Life, Perspective, Philosophy, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 6:55 PM

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Saturday, April 26, 2008

Hectic and...?

Ok, i was lazy and so didn't blog for quite a while (one month?) It was such a hectic and damn tiring month for me. Never seem to have enough sleep and rest. My eyes got smaller and my 'hei yuan quan' has gotten deeper and wider due to lack of sleep. (btw, what's english for hei yuan quan?) Pardon my poor english now. Form six here is definitely damn torturing.

We're having weekly tests nowadays. -.-" The teachers just have to give us the short quizzes and tests so that we can study. I mean it's good la considering that will definitely motivate me to study earlier before the 1st semester test. But what's annoying is that my stupid bio teacher expect us to have time to study, read the reference, do homeworks and read newspaper. Sounds like no problem. But when you have to stay back at school for four days a week for extra classes, duties and group study(after the extra class and a free tuesday), where do you have time for that? What?! Aren't we human?!!? Stupid B!@tch!!! We need at least a bit of time for something to release our stress called leisure! What the heck? You want us to go over the bend issit?

And somehow, I think she think we have so much time that instead of doing our work, we're wasting it off! We don't! We also have our responsibilities and need some personal time off!
I mean, teenage life is a hard phase of life we're going through so STOP assuming everything, you ******! Stop saying what we should have done, what we should do next! You don't have control over our life you control freak!

Sigh.... My forehead is still a grand canyon, sprouting out new geysers( at the average of 3) everyday. Can see my stress or not? In form 5, when i don't have much stress, i won't have much pimples anyway but now... sigh... Man, say stfu also kena condemn. My class is just full of 'polite' people and nerds. To me, polite people something makes me feel that they're so fake. Not sure la, that's just me. Scary also, i like to be around real people which the human nature to joke and stuff, not some future good employees (people who can rarely savour financial success due to lack of creativity and ideas).

So sien one.... I mean, it's like you won't break any traditions and just follow the the cycle which bourgeoisies have install for you. Just study, work, marry, give birth, retire and die. Why can i have like travel around the world or get rich or have fun for 10 more years in that list?
For nerds, ok la. I'm saying this because i've become a nerd and thus will try not to laugh at them. XP

We'll be practicing our dissection on mice on tuesday and i think it ain't gonna be pretty. See? Have to stay back also. What's more, we have short tests: maths 1 on monday(which i'm definitely going to flunk), pa on wednesday and friday(very long so have to split into half). Luckily thursday is labour day so won't have to go to school otherwise, they'll be a test as well. Test for whole week lagi.... Haven even go through that week and is already feeling the pressure. I'll definitely take the pics of my dissection experiment ;)

OOOoo, btw, my dad came by just last saturday. ;)

Labels: Family, Feelings, Me, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 6:28 PM

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Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Great news

Right, And here comes the good news. I PASSED ALL MY TESTS IN LAST TWO WEEKS' PRE SEMESTER TEST!!! Yes! You did NOT read it wrong! I PASSED ALL!!! Quite unexpected when a few number of people still failed in certain subjects. I'm so proud actually. I'm not that good in science subjects but since this pre semester exam, i feel more confident in achieving the 3.5 pointer i set myself for STPM. O, for an extra info, the overall pointer is 4. So, 3.5/4 is very hard to get. Getting 4 are for people like chi how, ccs and jie ming (Hmm, i'm turning into a geek? LOL!)

Here's the report of my grades( for form 6, 45 is the passing mark) :
Biology: 32/70= 46 and i might be able to get 47 if i get that extra one mark out of 70
Chemistry: 50 (Yes, over 100 and quite a good score compared to others)
English: According to my calculations, it's 81
Maths: Paper 1= 23/100 but paper 2= 72/100, so it's 47.5
PA(Malay)= 58/100

Right, i know it's still not good considering that most subject are in the boundary line of life and death . But still, when everyone have something that fails, it's a great achievement for me. Hello, this is Mr. KiSS you're hearing from. I mean, i prove myself that i can study and can achieve what others don't expect me to get, that i can be a genius as well. Side note: In other class, no one passed biology and i did. And the one who should had gotten the best mark in my class turned out to have 1 mark less than me. ;P

Here's a hurtful conversation someone had with me before the biology paper was given.
Sad guy who failed despite having tuition: Did you hear, all Sci 3 students' Bio paper 'quan jun fu mo'? The highest is only 41!
Pitiful me: What? Hmmm...(not much reaction)
SGWFDHT: The person who got the highest in the other class got a big fat cross for her essay! And everyone's essays are also like that.
Me: Hmmm, right.... but i believe Abraham(the guy who always get the highest in class for bio) will bring glory to our class. And i think our class will be better than them.
SGWFDHT: I agree. So, what do you think of it?
Me: I still think I have a fair chance of passing... Although a bit low but nevertheless i feel that even if i fail the paper, i won't be far from passing.
SGWFDHT: Wah! The highest in other class got 16/20 in her objective, what makes you think you can do better than her?

Ahem, the conversation went on something like this in chinese. But hey, although i'm a bit hurt for being looked down on,but he kept his fricking mouth shut when i got 31/70*100=44. But that's not all, teacher left out 1 mark from the calculations of marks and i got 32/70*100=46. Yeah! I passed! In your face! I didn't have tuition and i got a pass, what did you get?! Hmph! I know he fail only la. He's expected to fail as well actually.... I mean, why can't i changed and pass? I mean everyone have a fair chance of passing so don't ever judge a book by its cover, ok?

Now that i whine about my life and brag about my grade, i'm expecting rewards. LOL!

Labels: Acquaintance, Life, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 10:23 PM

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Monday, March 17, 2008

Start of school sem?

Although the new school sem did start today but i don't feel like it's the real official start of the new school sem. Why le? Because ho, after wednesday, we will have a 2 days holiday for thursday and friday. It seems that there's someone very important in the country whose birthday is on thursday so we're on holiday again. Then on friday, it's good friday for Christians, so holiday lagi. Waseh, when we have good friday in Brunei, i don't see anything happen le~~~(at least not around me la)

And as usual, in Malaysia, there's no schools on Saturday and Sunday. But,buT,bUT,BUT... there's more. I heard that there's another occasion on next monday(24/3), so we'll have another holiday on that day too. Sart or not? 5 straight day holiday eh. Hmmm, so i'm not in the mood for studying yet. Go to school for three days after a 10 day holiday and another 5 day holiday comes by again. Mana ada mood? Why didn't i skip these three days' classes and went back to Brunei since the start of my last holiday ah? Sien.... just know about it today. And i must say, as always, my signal is considered fast and efficient.

Hmmm, i got a few of my papers back from my pre sem test today but i won't announce it first. Let's just say that things turned out alright for me.... Just alright.... Sigh, i'm staying back until the evening even for these three days of school. Haiz, what a busy life i lead. Bo pian, people who do big business like me are always busy one la~~~ hAhahaHaHA!! (ok, you can puke now)

Labels: Holiday, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 9:54 PM

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Friday, March 07, 2008

*Holiday*

It's holiday now and guess what? I don't have any homeworks! Erm.... not exactly though.... But i'm not doing it? Haha, going back to the lazy old self again right after pre semester test. I sort of have a very high on my biology, chemistry and maths 2. As for maths 1. I'm definitely flunked it.... Man! Big mistakes!!! And it was a very easy paper!!! People are so going to get 70 above while i have to be content with a 20. Argh!!! I'm so angry with myself! I was too confident so i only studied 10 minutes for maths 1.

I'm not usually good in maths but how could i had been so confident? It's matrices.... and should be very easy. But i messed up 3X3 matrices while the majority part of the scores come from.... Shang Xin... This is what i called stupidity. Taken aback by my own foolishness. I may as well dig a hole when i get that paper back to save myself from all the humiliation...

However, i'm quite confident in my maths 2. Cause i was able to do correctly a 14/50 mark question. Some people can't do it so i feel a bit proud la. Lol! I mean it's not everyday that you find me, Mr. KiSS says that he's expecting a high grade in a maths test. In case no one remembers, i failed every add maths test in all form 5. I managed to pass 2 in form 4 though... lol

Hmmm, went out with friends to eat sushi king today at the spring. Got very full until i can't eat dinner... And for Rm 31 . Hey, it's consider very cheap if you compared to Brunei. Don't know whether i can be full or not with B$20 or not.

Went to watch movie today after the sushi .. We were going to watch jumper but it had already shown at 2:30.(We got there at around 3:20) and who the hell say the movie starts at 3:30 arh? >.> But then they want to watch vantage point. And you know what? I, KiSS don't like no movies like these. Assassination movie with a cute and determined bodyguard. And some hot and pretty girl gets involved....blah,blah,blah. An TYPICAL movie. There's no originality already these days for action movies. Boring. I think the movie will end with either the assassin got his target and live freely after or the assassin was killed or captured. You want to read/ watch an action movie? I can also write one for you la. Here's an evidence to prove that i was right that it was gonna suck.

Anyhow, we didn't watch that movie. Cause i managed to convince them to watch this one instead. The Mist based on stephen king's book. If you don't know stephen king, erm... I'm speechless since even i know. Note that i don't like to read books....much. It's a VERY good movie!!! Must watch! All movie of my choice are always interesting de la~~~ coz i'm very interesting de ma *pukes* I rate it a 4/5. Why minus one? Because it made me very kek sim...

Well, anyway i'm off to enjoy my holidays. Tata~~

Labels: Events, History, Memory, Perspective, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 11:20 PM

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Monday, February 18, 2008

Post CNY schedule

I am NOT lazy these days at blogging la. Just that my schedule is REALLY TIGHT! And i had not been getting enough sleep so if you're here, you can catch me sleeping in almost every class except.... CHEMISTRY!! Shocking but true. I just kept on copying everything she's explaining and from her slides and the board and i can really understand! Wow! Never thought i would be interested in chemistry. Well, organic chemistry la coz i heard that there's little calculations and many theory. There's also lots to memorize which i had not started.

Pre-semester test is coming and i'm a bit anxious. I really want to start studying but i can't. My schedule is like a uni student's schedule and even longer. Going to school at 7 am then only to go home after 5pm for the past one week! Really tired after that and after i finish my homeworks(some of it), it's time to sleep! How am i suppose to study like that. I'm starting to regret of having to participate in so many activities. Too many, i don't have enough time! My initial purpose of joining so many activities so that i can pass these boring days quickly to head out for uni. But what's the purpose if i can't even pass?

Bad thing happened. My pencil box, that 'nightmare before christmas' one got broken. The zip went off and i can close it now... have to buy a new one.... Worse, one of my tooth hurts during chinese new year. Though the pain stopped now, i don't think it won't stop till here. I need to find a dentist... fast! But can't seem to because of my packed schedule. :( And i can see one of my front tooth decaying.... OH no! You might see a bunny with a lost teeth the next time i went back! NO! But wait, i might not go back to brunei this year... Holidays will only be a week from now and these 'holidays' will actually have 'extra classes'. Talk about holidays. Since when did the definition of holidays changed? Let's check the dictionary. From the dic it says:

' any day exemption from work'. Since students are considered as an occupation and works given are known as assignments and homeworks. I don't think we can sue anyone for this, can we? I mean it is a violation of human rights.

Wrote an english essay to enter the Commonwealth Essay Writing Competition and i feel stupid to pass that up... I mean i try to write it like it was from a mature adult and with a local flavour of Malaysia. Local flavour? Yes! Mature? No! Over dramatic? Definitely! Haiz... i might want to write another one to compare. If it is better, then i'll use it... But given the current time i have... i don't think i can... Well, at least it was a nice try...

By the way, i have a few nice songs to recommend. English songs la. First is built to last by melee and the second one is Bleeding love by leona lewis. Go find it,lol! Anyway, please do recon some songs for me. am a music freak these days... could be my way to get rid of pressure...

Labels: Skool, Songs, Time

SS Phoenix @ 9:30 PM

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Sunday, February 03, 2008

Pre New Year Spirit

Yes! Chinese New Year will be here in a few days and i'm already getting lazy. Can't blame me, my holiday started from 1st till 11th. My family's coming over to Kuching and I can't wait to see my little baby brother (who by the way forgot my voice when they call from Bintulu). Can't blame him... he just woke up from a nap(which i can obviously differentiate). They'll be here tomorrow so i wouldn't be able to get online for a week. Why? Cause i'm going to stay in my grandparents' house until they leave which doesn't have a good signal of everything. Not even for my cell.

I'm been lazy in my studies since i came back. No surprise huh? I don't know... it just seems that i'm so carefree about it but the fact that i actually really do care but refuse to do anything about it kinda bugs me. Even my dear friends back in Brunei can't feel my stress that i kept so well in me. I guess i have my facial expression to thanks for that. Well, maybe i'm not really stress usually but i do stress when tests and exams are coming. But i vowed to do better once chinese new year ends. I hope i do succeed. But hey, i'm making effort in maths 2.

I have a 1500 word essay to write for my english class(MUET) cause i was voted by the majority of class (17:1) to participate in the commonwealth writing competition. There's also 4 others who were voted to write. And they need four to participate.... I'm LAZY!!! I kept on emphasizing to my classmates that my english is not really THAT good and that it's deteriorating rapidly. I think if they read some of my old classmates' essay back in chunghwa, they'll blow their head off. Truth is, i don't have much confidence in my vocabulary. I once saw haohan's essay and woah, i can't even understand some of the words in it without looking up the dictionary.

I find that i always get misunderstood with girls i get close to. There's a girl in my class who sit next to me. Well, I find that she's not that conservative and a bit 38. My kind of people ;) So, we talked a lot and rumors start between the others. A lot speculate that we are together but that's not the case. We're a bit like little brother and older sister(since she's older than me). Luckily, i found that some of my friends were actually not serious and they can feel that we are NOT together. Phew....

Well, i'm sure i told some already that i am the secretary of a club named the Interact club. It's growing quite well compared to other clubs with more than 20 members maybe even 30. Well, recently, i was given the task during a board of directors meeting that they want me to plan an event at a Children's Home. Ok, we're also going to do this activity with another school. I typed the letters and did everything so basically i'm almost done. Just hope nothing goes wrong. This is indeed my first time to be an organising person in charge for a school club and stuff. I think it's a great learning opportunity ;)

And for my school's sport day i went there and [s]compete[/s] sold drinks for my club. Business was quite good the day i went and the sports day lasted for 2 days. Went there on the first day. Hard that business sucks on day 2 so i guess it's me ;)
I must be a money tree~~

OOo, recently have lots of pimples on my face. Yes, even on my cheeks! Oh why me... I might as well do plastic surgery now. Lots of pimple on my forehead and not even pimple cream helps! Hmmm, could it be the fact that i start eating veggies? Man! I don't want to become a red bean bun! T.T

Well it's been ages since i updated and so blame it on my laziness. But i got nothing interesting to tell so will blog nonsense even if i did. Well, anyway, i'm sharing this blog with jeffrey so you can sometimes heard from him through my blog. Just look out for the name jeffrey kong after each post and you'll know it's his post. Well, Ta ta and happy chinese new year!

Labels: Events, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 10:12 PM

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Saturday, September 22, 2007

Adulthood and you know what that means...Booze time!!!

In just a few moments, my privileges will change forever! Not only can i do what i want (as long as it's legal) but i can decide my own life! Shocking isn't it to think of all the new work and responsibility you are going to hold. Which actually doesn't mean anything to me except that it would be very troublesome. Being an indecisive person as me, i'll take a lot of time to think about it. In short, i'm the customer who'll make the salesperson tick.

Anyhow, celebrated my birthday in advance with some good friends at the Hartz chicken. of course, i'm paying but only half of the price. Nope, not that it's my birthday(so they'll give a a discount) or i'm so cheap that i'll only pay for half the price....It's just that there's another one of my friend, Dinesh......who shares the same birthday date as me!!! Well, he's younger than me by one year and not to mention an indian. But anyway, it was ok but i feel really unwell after all those food.... Went to buy cd some more with that feeling in my stomach, you know the feeling you get when you're too full......

Spent a lot of $$$$$ today and i'm feeling a wee bit guilty towards my parents. Why? Maybe because i bought Cds with their hard earn money? What's more, games CD. I came all the way to study and why am i doing? Fluttering my money away which will harm me in my studies. Not that i'll study normally but still i don't need any more distractions than i usually have,right? The point is, now i'm spending money to distract my own self. How ironic....

And right now as i sit here typing this post, i had actually drank some alcohol!!! Hehe, i'm in the state between drunk and sober now.... Nah, just a little drunk but it's feels kinda good. I drank a 325ml of Tiger beer which consist of 5% of alcohol and a big mug of roughly the same amount of Royal stout which consist of 8% of alcohol. You think this is going to make me drunk? Hehe~~~

Anyway, my aunt actually allow me to drink for this once since i said it was my 18th birthday, a rite to adulthood. Haha.... and what can adult do which kids can't? Drink, fuck and drive. Since can't do any of the 2 later choice, i'll just pick door no.1. The heck. Anyway, that's all and i might not update my blog sooner since the semester exam is only 12 days away!!!!

Labels: Friends, Life, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 11:24 PM

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Thursday, August 30, 2007

I'm becoming worse.

Sigh...... i feel like an old man these days and think maybe i should retire or something.... I'm just too tired to do anything except watching movies and not moving entirely until the movie ends. The point here is, I'm getting lazier and lazier..... O.O" how can a person like me get lazier and lazier when i am already a lazy person? Well, it's worse now.... even i get the feeling that I'm being too*10000 lazy.

Failed every single tests here.....Not that I'm the only one failing but everyone, failed as well in maths paper 2 and chemistry. Only some people passed maths paper 1.... We haven't gotten our bio back but the teacher had already told us that it was disastrous. I know i failed that one too and so is P.A(Pengajian Am, the compulsory Malay subject that we needed to take...) Heard that the highest is only 12.5 out of 25..... So pass is the highest. I know i failed because:
1. I didn't finish my conclusion
2. I only wrote about 200plus words in which the requirement is between 300 to 350....

I'm just getting slower and slower.....like getting old.... Though i don't expect my self to pass but i also didn't expect myself to fail so miserably... So terrible, it's even worse than when i was in form 5. Depressed? Definitely. Suicidal thought? Unless it's the end of earth.

Planned to go out to Santubong, a place with thick forest as well as a nice beach to catch insects for our group project with my group. We're doing preservations of the insects as well as plants. Due date is three weeks later but it's not enough(for the plants). We need to catch insects! Things that i don't usually touch or even dare to share the same space with. Sigh...... It was suppose to be tomorrow but it was postponed to Saturday....

Now the end of all these shits.

I GOT A NEW LAPTOP LAST SUNDAY!!!! Congrats me and it's great! Web cam is infused into the laptop already!!! All for RM1999! With space of 120GB HDD, DVD player and a digital surround system which comes with it(the catalogue say one la). It's definitely worth it. Did i mention it's ACER? Well, it's my prize possession now. Treasured it really, really much.

That's it. That's the only thing i feel happy about these days....

I'm thinking of taking IELTS. aka The International English Language Test System. I mean with my ability, I'm confident that i won't fail it.....yet, not getting a good results either... Heard that it's really hard but they holding it once a month if i'm not wrong. The catch is.... it cost a bloody 500+ ringgit to take a test like that. don't have that much money... don't wanna waste money unless I'm absolutely confident about taking that test.(which i don't think I'll ever will.....) Oh well, at least it's an internationally recognized test.

I want to learn to drive but i don't think i can with my current schedule..... Sigh.... Life is hard....

Labels: Depress, Life, Me, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 10:52 PM

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Saturday, August 11, 2007

No excuses, just tests

I don't know why but i lost the inspiration to blog nowadays. It's been like around a month since i blogged....Don't know why..... i've even stopped reading blog until just recently. Maybe because i'm having quite a lot of stress and pressure right now all coming in one go. Peers pressure, studies pressure, activity pressure, a bit of family pressure and so on. But what can i do? As someone with high EQ (err-hem), i've identified all these pressure and managed to cope with it. With help from O2jam and my aunt, of course. Of course many events has happened so it's gonna be a long,long post to make up for the long absence.

On a saturday, two weeks ago on 28th of July. Went to an American fast food chain food store. Guess what? It's an all-you-can-eat buffet!!! The name of the store: Hartz chicken!! For only Rm15 (excluding service tax), you can eat all sort of junk food, fast food and fatty food ranging from soft drinks, ice cream, fried/roast chicken meat(plus all the organs inside) to spagetti, curry and marsh potatoes with only 15 ringgit!!! A worthwhile bargain!!! Too bad, i ate until i puke a bit and continue to eat again but at last, i puke again when i got back home. Was too bloated. And it's effect lasted for five days. I call it ' The Hartz effect!'

Some weeks ago(forgot the actual date) .... I was having Muet class(Malaysian University Entrance Exam).... OMG!!! We watch a clip about a woman who's giving birth!!! All the details were inside!!! The private part,the cutting, the blood and the time when the baby came out!!! Yes, all frontal view. Trust me, it ain't pretty. BE GRATEFUL TO YOUR MOTHER!!! Kektio, i wasn't able to eat breakfast during recess after that clip. I know it was gonna be ugly but i didn't expect it to be THAT ugly. Hmmm, maybe the govt could try to promote safe sex but selling that as porn. You know, disgust that documentary as a porn saying hot sex and stuff. Then when those perverts and rapists see it, maybe they'll change their minds.

Chemistry short quiz on a certain monday 6th of August( happens once every chapter finishes)- The effect? The chemistry shocked effect. Don't know whether i might fail or not but hopefully not. Which reminds me that i got around 41 and 2 over 3 for my first chem short quiz. Grade= Pass by a little. Not fair but at least i know i did the right thing by NOT peeking unlike..... but luckily there's only less than my fingers number who are doing that.

A few days ago on a certain wednesday, 8th of August. I had my Bio test! The results, FAIL!!! Yes, the big capital F! I haven't receive my paper back yet but i know my result from my bio/form teacher. Reason is quite simple, i missed chapter one lesson and she focused around 40 marks out of 50 for chapter one. An additional catch is that the chapter one topic was biochemistry. Heck, how am i gonna understand those molecular structures of glucose, cellulose.....etc on my own? I suck in chemistry in case anyone haven't notice especially in calculations and formulae. Damn! Luckily i don't think there wouldn't be much formulae in bio anymore over the next 21 chapters!!!

I almost flipped in class yesterday on 10th August. That guy sitting beside me is sooo damn annoying!!! He keeps making excuses for his annoyance by calling them as jokes. Cheh! What's the point of 'joking' if he's the only one who finds it funny? Plus, i'm not the first and only one who got pissed off at him. I thought maybe i was being a bit oversensitive at first but then again if i'm not the only one who got pissed off, then it's not my fault, ain't it? That's it, i'll be changing my seat even if it means sitting at the first row. It might be torturing in maths class but i'll get use to it soon enough.

Confrontation
In my current school, they also go by the system whereby the prefects takes disciplinery actions against the students. However, they are all understanding and helpful most of the time. They are also reasonable. No, they wouldn't use their special identity like some kind of power hungry freaks. They are only there to advise the students and if they fail, then they have to write down the offender name and pass it up to the disciplinery officer.

Anyway, that's not the main point. I kinda got into a little confrontation with their assistant head girl( sorta like the assistant head of prefects for girls) regarding..... name tags. Yeah, we are all supposed to have a name tag sown to our shirt. But!!! since a lot of the form six students are new students, they don't have their name tags even if we had paid for it a month ago( for me, three weeks). And the prefect wants us to buy a temporary name tag(TNT) made of manila card for 50 cents!!! Hey! We're new students and it should be acceptable that we have no name tags at the moment! It's not about the money, it's about our principle! Plus, the people who are supposed to buy those TNT are supposed to be those who did not bring their name tags to school. So, how the heck are we, the new students suppose to bring it if we don't have it? They should give it to us for free, ya know.

Acting on my instinct, i reasoned with the assistance head girl that i refuse to buy that ugly piece of yellow paper aka TNT. I demanded that she provide a perfectly reasonable reason that we must buy that TNT, giving my reasons and all why i refuse to buy it. Guess what, they just don't have any good enough reasons. Until today, they still haven't give me the reason. Oh, did i mention that their head boy aka big chief of the prefects is in my class? Not even him can give me a good reason.

The other day as i walked through the security check made up by the prefects to check for tidy uniform,TNT...etc after the incident, one of the normal prefect who obviously doesn't know who she's dealing with asked me for my name tag. Turning my head back slowly to look at her, i was about to 'do my stuff' when the assistance head girl(yeah, her again) said never mind about moi, which literally means that i'm free to go without being bother for not having a name tag. That was a sign of my victory.

Went to the kuching fest a few hours ago, and it was great! Lots of food!!! Food heaven!!! It's way better than brunei's pasar malam, that's for sure. And the chinese singers there was magnific! Very good voices. The catch is that there's too many people (and traffic jam) with too little tables there. Lots of different stalls there. I ate a lot of food from different cultures though they're not really imported from the native country or something. They don't call it kuching fest for nothing. I was able to eat korean, chinese, taiwanese, thai, italian, indian and local food. Missed japanese, indonesian and malay food though.... didn't feel like eating sushi unless there is tempura. Most importantly, i ate something called.... FRIED ICE CREAM!!! Yes, it's ice cream which has been fried in bread powder. It'll still be ice cream after it got fried. Locked inside bread, you'll just don't which flavor you're getting until you take a bite.

You Are a Centaur

In general, you are a very cautious and reserved person.
However, you are also warm hearted, and you enjoy helping others in practical ways.
You are a great teacher, and you are really good at helping people get their lives in order.
You are very intuitive, and you go with your gut. You make good decisions easily.

What Mythological Creature Are You?

It's hard for me to make decisions. Hope this long post is enough to make up for the past month. Song added: Planetarium and Flavor of Life.

Labels: Emotions, Events, Food, Skool, Songs

SS Phoenix @ 3:55 PM

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Thursday, July 19, 2007

Busy bee~~~

I know,i know.... i had been neglecting my blog for almost two weeks. Been quite busy trying to catch up all the topic i missed. I now announce that i like chemistry more than maths. Shocking, isn't it? Don't know but i can't seem to do even the maths i learned like logrithms.... Guess i've been wasting my time in maths class in form 4 and form 5.

Hahaha... Heard that if you have as many position in the clubs you joined at school, it would be more easier to get the scholarships. There was 15 classmate in my class two weeks ago but one left a day later but two more came a week later. Then after another week, another new guy came. So, basically we now have 17 ppl in the class with 7 guys and 10 girls.

There's one guy who came with a girl about a week ago, guess what? He was recruited into the prefects along with the girl the FIRST DAY he came to the school. And today, he was elected as head of prefects!!! Shocking eh.... heard that the reason was before he came to the school, he was already elected as head of prefects in his school before he got transferred. Lots of prefects who didn't get any position and had train for the whole month under rain and sun wanted to quit partially because they suspect that there were favouritisms in the election of the head prefect. It's unfair to them and i guess they didn't know that he was already elected in his previous school. But the other reason was purely because they didn't get any position. Kinda give me an impression that they have the 'sour grape' mentality.

Hmmm, as for me, i had only one position in all the stuff i joined. I was selected by the teacher as supervisor librarian for wednesday but it's all the same except that i get higher marks but more work like writing reports.... Still haven't found a sport to join yet since all the time between the sports and clubs clash together.

Will going onto the street to ask for donations as a member of the red crescent society. I think i'll be going on....umm.... sunday? Not really sure... Thus, you can see i've been really busy.

I think i'll be going back to MD when i go back to Brunei on August. Reason: I need to return the books i borrowed from the teacher personally. Ok, then maybe i can also meet some friends while i'm there as long as it's not too early.... Need sleep now.... good night.

PS. Don't you find my english deterioting? I do.... T.T

You Were Born Under:

Popular and crafty, you are a master at the art of seduction.
You are intelligent and intuitive - and make a savvy businessperson.
You live life to the fullest, even if it means maxing out your credit cards.
Many people are secretly (and hopelessly) in love with you.

You are most compatible with a Rooster or Ox.

What Year Were You Born Under?

Aiya, don't say anymore.... Can't pick business liao!!!

Labels: Life, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 10:53 PM

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Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Bright but dangerous. Dark but safe.

First post from Kuching. Had been in a bad mood.... It's quite tiring and frustrating. Ok,the day i left i was very emotional. I don't know, maybe i just flipped or something. Was not really mentally prepare to leave. Who would when you only know that you're gonna leave your family and friends four days before you're leaving. Was as shock as anyone.

Oh well, i guess it'll be good for me? Miss my parents!!! T.T
I guess i might get use to it soon? I hope so..... I mean i'll leave them sooner or later but..... I DON'T WANT IT TO BE THIS SOON!!! Sigh.....On a side note: Be grateful you still have our parents around.

First day in Kuching: Well, got up quite early. Went to school and it seems that an academic officer was expecting me. Well, she knew i wanted art and ask whether i want to study in an account class or bahasa melayu. Errrr, dumb question for me, of course i'm choosing Account. And when i got into class, it was......not as i expected. You know, they said that Green Road Secondary School(GRSS)<----- [kinda look like grass......grass school?] is among the best school in Kuching. I was expecting sophisticated, brilliant and interesting minds, not the opposite...... Sigh, art class student are ummmm......artistic? And after a few periods i was dumbfounded...... I was expecting english medium but turns out that they use english in science stream and malay in art. So, how? Don't understand bo.....plus, the class was crowded. With about 30 to 40 ppl.

Day 2: Errr, a weird thing happened. You see, the seniors there( form 4,5 and 6) are all in the morning class and need to wear tie. And so, i went in without a tie since i haven't bought it the previous day. Kinda forgot about it. So ummmm, one of the 'pengawas'(prefect) there stopped me at the gate.

Pegawas: Eh?! Are you in the afternoon class or what? Why come so early?
Me: Errrr, I'm in the morning class......
Pengawas: !!!...... Then, why no tie?!?!
Me: Ummmm, I just transferred here yesterday.......
Pengawas: OHHH!!! Ummmm, well....be sure to take a tie.
*Other pengawas about 20 in line were looking at us the whole time.*
All the pengawas and the one who talked to me(who apparently looks like the head): WELCOME!!!
-_-"'

So now i look like a form 1 to form 3 student. HOW NICE......! *notice my sarcastic tone*
Mei Li Mao!!! Some of them are even younger than me.......and they looked at me with those shocked looks! And i'm suppose to be the senior...Sigh.... what to do? I look young ma.....Dunno whether i should be happy or sad.

I have something to announce..... I'M TAKING SCIENCE T.T..... Chem,maths,english, pelajaran am and the last....(bio or physics?).... I choose bio la. I don't need another subjects with lots and lots of calculations...... It's in english ba,that's why lo. By the way, I'm beginning to like chem....haha, the teacher was VERY NICE!!! Well, now i need to catch up a month's worth of work. Well, at least my new classmate are more friendlier and more what i expected. And guess what, there's only 15 ppl in the science one class and only 5 are boys.

Found out that i need to join a minimum of two clubs(or three)!!! Three categories: Uniformed clubs(cadet, prefect and such), Sports(!!!, Hey, i don't play sports one!!!) and ummm normal club(i dunno la, don't know what they have, i'll go see tomorrow....) Well.....I MISS EVERYONE!!! T.T

This world is sooo cruel.......Might have to go tuition for maths and chem.....

Your Inner Child Is Scared

Like a kid, you tend to shy away from new experiences.
You prefer what's tried and true - novelty is scary!
New foods, new places, and new friends are difficult for you to deal with.
Some say you're predictable, but you enjoy being comfortable.

How Is Your Inner Child?

Labels: Family, Feelings, Life, Me, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 7:34 PM

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Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Sickness in my heart and soul

I am going out of my mind. Yes, this will also be one of my 'i should had thought about the consequences before i acted' post. It happened yesterday and had been quite bothering me ever since. Ok, it was in EAS class and we were discussing about persuasive text/debate we had. Ok, Dr. Sunil(not really a medical doctor) was talking back on how we all had done well and went to the topic of............. you guess it,Love vs Money. He was making some statement about people with an high capita in one country having many worries.....etc. Naturally, as someone who has an immerse instinct to debate.............rebuke him.........Yes, you did not hear me wrong,i rebuked the teacher.

Well, after a brief exchange of arguements.....he said that i don't get the point. What???!!! I'm perfectly sure that i understood what he said. Well, i kept quiet then although i could rebuke him. In the end, the class progress normally. That's not the point, i just thought it was a harmless debate and lo and behold, one of my Eng Lit classmate who is also in my EAS and history, told me that she feels that sir was going against me or something. Of course she supported my points as she feels that they were good points but she found that sir was a bit annoyed by me. Instantly, my normal, lame mood suddenly turns bitter. Got depressed and couldn't really get it off my mind even until now.

Oh heavens, why did thee not give me any sign of dejavu? What did thee just watched in silent as if it were a drama in thy TV? And i've just made a bad impression on a History teacher(not mine though) before that scene happened.

Oh well, other thing is..... BANZAI!!! Yesh! It's the latest trend! It can be used as any words you like even as a swear word. I.e: A brick fell on your one of your foot and it can be used in 'Oh my BANZAI foot!' Ahahahaha~~~~ Man, i am getting REALLY lame.

And thanks to Eteng, the song 'Thanks for the memories' by Fall Out Boy is officially on my Disaster Box( even if i don't favourite that other song of theirs). And their MV for the song, weird but creative and hillarious. Well, watch it and you'll know what i mean.

I feel that the song's a bit gay. I mean they are a boy band right? Then what's with line in their lyrics about '.....He taste like you,only sweeter.....'??? Sounds gay to me. Oh and i have a great idea of a story that i'll be writing in the blog. Well, it's gonna be totally different from all those normal and unoriginal stories. It's gonna be a R-rated one,buahahahaha!!!! I think i would post it on my next post so if you're under 18.......ok,17, then you can't read it! This MEANS Wei Hon!!! Ahahahaha..... Well, here's a bit of idea; i got my inspiration from a book we're reading in EngLit and well, you DO NOT want to imagine what the contents are.

How You Life Your Life

You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside.
You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think.
You're open to new people and friends, which makes you a pretty popular person.
Some of your past dreams have disappointed you, but you don't let it get you down.

How Do You Live Your Life?

Labels: Banzai, Me, Skool, Songs

SS Phoenix @ 5:08 PM

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Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Think before i speak!!!

I wonder why i've been so tired starting last week. I've been sleeping early......11.30~12. Hey,my usual bedtime is 12 30 la. So,why am i still sleepy. Right now, i'm prone to sleep in English Lit class. Feeling kinde guilty since Sir Peter Holland's (i think he likes people to call him that) a very nice teacher with almost no temper......though he once said to me that i looked like a train wreck on one particular day......

I think i've been getting brainless these days. I mean i don't really think before i speak. The results: Total social suicide. Especially in History class. I didn't realized that i was talking full of pride. E.g

History Teacher: Ok,since Siong Siang had gotten best speaker on the last presentation, he is not eligible to be elected again. We must give chance to other people,is that alright,SiongSiang?
Brainless me: What??!!! Then no chocolate for me????......*stops* ok but the winners have to share their prize with me. *laugh*. I guess i have to get best group then.......

Idiotic me to the guy(who by the way looks like a psychotic killer when he laughs) beside me: Man, i thought i could get the chocolates again.........
Guy: *smile* no chocs for you.

Can you see something wrong with the picture? LIKE I'LL DEFINITELY WIN......I was talking in such a vain manner....I wouldn't be able to win all the time,right? And i just realize it after it happened.....*hit myself on the head* Drat! I guess i am getting so use to the 'non-survival' games classes that i totally got carried away. If i talk like this in the previous yr in F5Sci, i'll be eliminated in a second. Phew,have to restrain myself.

Got exchanged seat from a clear view of the whiteboard in history class to a view where the teacher can't really see me well and with a 6 feet guy blocking the whiteboard. What the #$%^??!!! The reason, she wants to see clearly the people who failed the MPR. I got a C,the highest anyone could get for this MPR......or so said a History student from another block. But still, i think i've reached my best standard.......i don't really think i can improve anymore.

And guess what. I'll be getting suspended by the school coz i didn't pass my student pass. So, if i don't go to school on Saturday, you can assume that i'm suspended temporary, i think.

Oh yeah,must introduce a new song from SHE called 'Wu Yue Tian' or Mayday.
Oh here's the video with with Ah Xin from Mayday in it.

Selina and Ah Xin KISSED!!!!

And there's a duo band which i think isn't really newly formed but the lead singer is quite pitiful. He got nominated for Best Male Singer five times and never won. He's a singer with the talent but not the looks. The group's called 优客李林 . His voice is like heaven man. I think he can even match Fei Yu Ching. I think their song 'Just for you' can be sing on birthdays. Which remind me, why can Jay Chou become a Idol Superstar???!!! His songs are getting worse and he isn't really ummmmm, have the good looks of a star. Ok, to tell the truth, i maybe a little biased since i'm not really a fan of him. You figure it out. Anyway, of course some of his songs are nice la~~~~~

Well, i've been getting socially suiciding myself so i have to start saving my 'reputation' or else i might not finish this year.

You Follow Your Heart

You're romantic, sentimental, and emotional.
You tend to fall in (and out of) love very quickly.
Some may call you fickle, but you can't help where your emotions take you.
You've definitely broken a few hearts, but you're not a heartbreaker by nature.
Your intentions are always good, even if they change with the wind

Do You Follow Your Head or Your Heart?

Ummmmmm, i've never fall in love lo. Fickle i am but i never,ever.....(well,except my friends') break any hearts. And my intentions never have much change,plz la,it makes me sound like and emotional person. I AM NOT.

Labels: Criticism, Skool, Songs

SS Phoenix @ 5:54 PM

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Tuesday, May 01, 2007

@^#@#&^&$^!!!!!!

The reason for the title is this: As frequent visitors to my blog will know that i hasn't been updating much lately and the reason for that is because i've moved house so no phone line. Then last wednesday,the phone line works already. And TODAY, my dad found out that the wiring connecting the espeed is WRONG! WTF!!!!! My dad's a more idiotic computer user than me and he FIXED it!!!!!A lot of lines fall down -_-!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!! Die lo~~~~~

Hmmmm,just got the burden of Sociology test off me....sigh......Failed lo~~~~~~ The reason for my assume failure:Not enough time to finish my essay,so......die lo~~~~Will be having History on next monday but i gotta tell ya,it's definitely gonna be more easier than Socio. Up until now,all my works in MD are all C below with occasional B. And i can't seem to improve.....yet. But at least i'm trying ma.

Let's see i had a lot to say in my mind but can't really recall it. Anyway, i have a few stuff to say now.

1. Most malays are really nice people. I've met quite a lot of friendly people. Definitely people i like to meet!

2. I HATE MD's SYSTEM!!! When they want to inform something,they'll write it on the white board outside the Admin Office. Pffft! I don't usually walk pass there and now i need to because i need to see what stuff i need to know.Some clubs are even more 'obvious' to let us know what they 'll be doing like having a meeting.....By pasting pamplets! WAH,SOOOOOO OBVIOUS!!!! As if i know a piece of 'junk like' looking paper is informing something important. Well, personally,i like PTE's intercom. That would REALLY be informing. Yet,just inform the stuff at the right time coz i heard that they even inform when lessons is preceding.

3.I've done a lot of 'face-throwing' stuff. Now,i'm basically trying to stay out of sight. For Eg. B4 Socio test today,me and the boywatcher were walking to class. Halfway,with her ultra boy senser,she spotted Alexander(Good looking but........) in a class we walked pass. Seeing through the dark glass was nothing with her super boy-crazed eyes. She asked: Is that Alexander???!!! And i have to be busybody enough to walk backward and look through the window for her. And i confirmed for her with Al looking at me and i looking at him.(You know,eye to eye)The most embarassing part: More than half the class was looking at me!!!! Toink! I have to stop getting into other people's business or i'm gonna regret it. I was disrupting their class walking backward and take a peek into their room. Fine,fine.

4.I'm desperate for a locker! Too much file to carry so i really need one! Well, just two and one in my bag but you'll be complaining too if you have to carry that gigantic Socio textbook!

5.An interesting moment in class....yesterday in EAS. I was staying up late to study Socio so i fell asleep in EAS. I was slowly opening my eyes when i was touched by somebody and before i open my eyes entirely. The humourous EAS teacher was shouting in a VERY LOUD voice beside my ears saying 'IS THERE ANYONE HOME???!!!' Ok, i was a bit blur but anyway, the caring teacher was concerned about me and asked if i'm sick or what. Nah,i was just tired. But he's a nice teacher la cause i don't think he ever got mad.

Finally,i'm still wondering whether i got into First Aid Prefect or not. Actually, i'm starting to regret interviewing for it. Ahahaha. If not choosen,then i will have more time to go online and sleep instead of staying back at school sometimes. If i get choosen, well......i'll ummmm.......haiz, will have to go on with it lo since i don't want a bad record......Sigh. Irony. I interviewed for prefect so i can make my record more prettier and now i regret and if i regret and quit; will get bad record. Not exactly regret but rather not really eager like before i interviewed for it.

I CAN BE REALLY 'hangat*2 tahi ayam' at times!

You Are 50% Extrovert, 50% Introvert

You're a bit outgoing, a bit reserved
Like most people, you enjoy being social
But you also value the time you have alone
You have struck a good balance!

Are You An Extrovert or An Introvert?

Labels: Blog, Class, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 3:05 PM

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Saturday, April 07, 2007

Life's like LOL??!!!

Today i found a shocking fact that there's a friendly malay girl from an all girl's school had been in all of my class (History,Sociology,Eng Lit and EAS) for the past 2 months. Well, almost. She dropped her EAS and changed to GP so, almost every class. But she's also have the same PS block with me and has the same Civic class. Kektio, such a coincidence and i just realize today...... *lots of lines coming down in dark blue background*

Haiz, i think i'm stuck in MD liao lo~~~~Drat! Even if i wanted to go, i don't have a chance. Yeah right, the'r words was like treating me like a mature adult and yet in the end, to them, i'm just their little boy forever. Jeez wheez, they want me to grow up and mature but how could i if they're actually not letting me. Parents.......sigh. I think i'm trap in the bonds that will destroy my future life.

So,how do you guys think of the new layout? Found it on blogskins and couldn't resist to use it. Of course i kept a copy of Piang's work and i think i'll switch between them,hohoho. Plus, what do you guys think about the song 'Set the fire to the third bar' by Snow Patrol? Is it my taste getting worse or just that my sis doesn't really have any good sense in music anyhow. I prefer to say that she has worse taste than me. Kids can't really 'feel' the songs. That's a phrase i've gone through.

I'll be busy next week....real busy. All my sub are gonna be doing lots of stuff like we'll be having a quiz with assessment marks in EAS, Essay from Socio due on next Thursday,Play in English Lit which we have to memorise the lines( all the thee and thou,jeez) and for history, a possible essay assignment. *Faints* Plus, i'll be presenting the Civic stuff on Monday which i did not entirely lay a finger on it or even seen it yet. The unforturnate partner of mine is doing all the work, so to not entirely embarass myself,i'm doing research now on prayer. I think maybe i'll also get some info on other religion's prayer, to prepare myself and enrich the presentation. God, i have to speak Malay!(which i got E last yr for the oral......)

Thinking of dropping Kendo,too bothersome to go from place to place.Especially when my transports are limited. Unless i drive which wouldn't happen for at least a year. Sigh~~~ Life's a joke if ya ask me.

I find that some people are so funny because unlike me, they crave for popularity which i think is an empty thing to have. Why have plastic when you can actually have warmth? In fact, i happen to laugh at the one who wants popularity more than everything else. I mean, anyone can achieve popularity, just that it's something i think will pass eventually. I've been popular once,(note:once) but i just threw it away. It kinda limits stuff you can do. And why would you need it when you don't have the real 'soul'? I rather have the real 'soul' devoted then having a temporary shelter full of lies~~~~

You Are As Cool As They Come

Rational and relaxed, no one could accuse you of being dramatic.
You roll with the punches, and nothing ever gets you too worked up.
You are able to maintain perspective and see the big picture.

And even if you're emotional inside, you don't let it show.
You're great at keeping it together, and you're rewarded for that.
People see you as an ideal friend, employee, and partner.

Are You a Drama Queen (or King)?

Seriously, i'm really full of drama. So, REJECT!

Labels: Acquaintance, Blog, Crossroads, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 4:07 PM

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Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Is it a crime to have second thoughts?

Oh my god, i guess i'm quite 'wu ke jiu yao' liao. Now, i'm having second thoughts about going Kuching...............again. KEK DAO~~~~i CAN"T make up my mind.....ok, i know i said that when i get accepted,i'll definitely go but now because i'm starting to like MD,arrrgh~~~~ actually, it seems that there's something violent running about in Sarawak. Call me weak, i'm used to Brunei being boring but still, it's sooooooo peaceful le~~~~

Aiyo, i know i can go to Kuching without dying or getting too home-sick but the catch is, is it a better choice for me? That is the question. Though i'm quite upset that i didn't get to do Business. Toink! We must all realize that what i'm taking now in MD is good for a few selected and limited job. Lawyer,journalist,writer,mass media stuff,sociologists,ummmmmm historian? Duh, when i look at these job options, questions cross my mind. These jobs are giving me questions like 'Hey, how much do i earn from these jobs?' Basically, i can only see that my future is dim at the moment. Ever heard that journalists and writers are very,very poor unless you're the next J.K Rowling but she was also tight before Harry Potter was published.

Yeah,right. A lawyer/attorney???!!! Please la, i think i heard that the people study law from England la~~~~ Plus, i wouldn't be able to move from country to country or change my profession to much extend if i become one. Plus, i have an unclear speech problems and i will be dreaming about my next life if i want to study law in England la. And my parents might not be able to send me to study law even in Malaysia. I'll most likely end up in UBD if i stay here and what can i study in UBD???!!! History kah and become a poor scholar for the rest of my life? Sociology? Become what? Sociology teacher meh? I thought about that the most lowly job i'll go for is teacher. Not really lowly la,but to me, i hate kids so there,i might go berserk and kill them......hahaha~~~~

The reason i wanted to go to Kuching was because I'll have a second chance of choosing the subjects over again and this time,business and accounting are in my consideration. At least i think i'll survive out in the society. I can become an accountant and live the boring paperwork life or a business man who knows his accounts so he wouldn't be cheated. Sadly the choice i made in selecting the subject i'm studying now are all based on my dream. But face it, this is the real world. There's only working class waiting for me if i follow my dream. I know it sounds like i'm getting mild and dreamless, which some said without dreams then you'll be worthless.
But, since studying sociology, i must think that maybe because people follow their dreams that they end up as working class and middle class. Never the upper class people. Ok, some people do succeed but what are the chances? i think it's even less than 0.1 out of 10. Where do you get all the rich?

Ok, i'm in denial. I'm just feeling insecure,that's all. I thought that i should learn more skills in order to survive the harsh world. Thinking of learning skills such cooking,hairstyling.....etc. Those professions that involves skills. At least i'm be able to open my own cafe and such lo. Haiz, being 'duo xin' will kill one if ya know what i mean. So, this huge thing has been giving me headache for quite some time. Even my dad's think that staying in Brunei might be good for me. Duh~~~~~It's because i want to start to rely on myself rather than my parents, that's why i have the idea to go anyway. Plus, if i start Form 6 there in Malaysia, i might even get a loan from the govt to study uni la. The very benefit i'm hoping for in the future, so i can lighten my parents' burden. It might not sound like me to sound like that,i guess.

Anyhow, if i really need to decide liao before the payment to enter AS Level closes this Thursday. Well, now i have a funny thought. There's always room for insurance agents and salesperson..........AHHHHHHHHHHHH~~~~~~~~~~

Your Dominant Thinking Style: Visioning

You are very insightful and tend to make decisions based on your insights.
You focus on how things should be - even if you haven't worked out the details.

An idealist, thinking of the future helps you guide your path.
You tend to give others long-term direction and momentum.

What's Your Thinking Style?

Labels: Crossroads, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 9:15 PM

Leaving love at |9:15 PM| ~-~ 0 Hearts given

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Ummmm.....*face blushes*

Today,i discovered a weird thing about my History lecturer. She's nice and all but i think she really,really,really likes chinese people lo. I don't know,just think it was kinda weird for her to keep praising us chinese. Maybe she was being sarcastic? But ummmm, i don't really think so though, she seems kinda real when she's praising..... She's saying that chinese are very organised(......on second thought,maybe she has yet to see the unorganised ones)and disiplined . Ummmm, does this all apply to me? Don't really think so. Anyhow, there was also one day when she was kidding with the guys in the class and it was something about joking about a guy's gf. She was saying something like chinese are not 'hiao' or something like that and that we're a hardworking race which we're all taking 4 to 5 subjects . She says that them,the Malays should learn from us chinese in a lot of ways.

Anyhow, that's not the point. Everytime she praises the chinese, after one praise or two, she'll go like 'Right,Siong Siang?' Ummmm, quite paiseh,given that i wasn't quite the teachers' favourite in CHMS. Why huh? and that's not all, everytime the teacher ask 'Right,SiongSiang?' Everyone looks into my direction, i mean like.....the whole class.The front turn to face me and the side turn left to face me too. Ummm, actually i don't really know how to handle a situation like that. I could only just give a smile......... I wonder if the people in class will become hostile to me........ maybe backstabbing me like i'm a teacher's pet or something......(which got me thinking that i'm one of the 2 chinese in class,why me? because i sit nearer to the front than him?)

Anyhow, when we got the form to apply for the AS Level today, it got me thinking again. Should i stay in Brunei or go to Kuching? The due date to pass up the form with the money is four days later for me(BE6). If i pass up the money, that means i'm staying la. Money cannot refund man....... and if i don't pass up and if the Kuching there don't accept me, then i'll miss my chance
to take AS Level for my 3 subjects recommended to do AS. God, my head hurts!

Oh yeah, currently sacrificing my precious time to do my history homework to play the NBA2 Elbert put up. Damm you and thank you both at the same time for making me addicted to the game. Took only 20minutes to download. I must say, it's harder than the Demo.... kept losing.

Ah well, all i can say it,life is full of decisions(which i am not go at making) and surprises.

You Are Strawberry Ice Cream

A bit shy and sensitive, you are sweet to the core.
You often find yourself on the outside looking in.
Insightful and pensive, you really understand how the world works.

You are most compatible with chocolate chip ice cream.

What Flavor Ice Cream Are You?

Labels: Crossroads, Games, Skool

SS Phoenix @ 6:12 PM

Leaving love at |6:12 PM| ~-~ 0 Hearts given

Friday, March 23, 2007

Progress

Yes, finally,i've start to do some of the holiday work. Read the 14 page notes.......in 2 hours and boy, i'm telling ya, it's not because i'm a slow reader but rather, there's some vocabulary which i need to look up in the dic(dictionary) and i need to fully understand the meanings. The first few chapters in Sociology is like Chem, everything afterwards will be related to it like in Chem, the stupid 'moles'. Now that i finish reading it,i guess i need to start 'writing' it.

Anyhow, if i don't let my laziness stop me anymore,my work should be finish before the start of school. Anyhow, there's this song that's really funny. I find it hilarious but maybe christians will find it insulting. But there's no mv for that song......Anyhow,enjoy listening to it. Some of you may heard it cause it's about 2 years old already but anyhow i find the lyrics and tune hilarious.

Might not sound quite nice to some ultra-sensitive people but it's really funny.Buahahahaha :B And FYI, he's not saying fucking hell, he's singing i'm stuck in hell........Trying to clean it up a little.

I'm a bit addicted to the cinema~~~ feels like watching movies but i don't see any interesting movie at the moment except Stomp the Yard. But i think i'll go to the blackmarket for it. And no, i don't want to watch Mr.Bean,thank you. I always thought that was dumb, who's in the world who's unsensible and stupid enough to do such acts la, unless he's a real retard or not really 'socialized'.

......i think i should lay off sociology for a while........

All American Kid

Popular but not plastic. Athletic but not a jock. Smart but not a brain.

You were well rounded and well liked in high school.

Who Were You In High School?

Ummmmm, does it really mean stick to the popular kind of person? And yeah i'm really athletic, walking to the canteen/sleeping is the sport i'm so good at.......and ummm, smart? maybe but definitely not a brain,that's for sure. Well round heh? So, people likes me because i have a round stomach and round face?

Labels: Skool, Songs

SS Phoenix @ 6:09 PM

Leaving love at |6:09 PM| ~-~ 0 Hearts given

Yours Truly KSS